I have a long-standing rule to not buy food that ridicules me. But, during the week between Christmas and New Year’s, idealism goes out the window as I stock up on holiday-themed treats at a deep discount. Casper’s “Fat Boy” ice cream sandwiches are part of what I call the “I Told You So” and “Don’t Say You Weren’t Warned” advertising movements. While it’s a lot of fun to grab a box of “Fat Boys” and say, “All right, this Fat Boy is coming home with me tonight”, it’s sad when you get to the register and realize, “wait… I’m the Fat Boy.”

In any case, these ice cream sammies live up to their name: Your typical sandwich has 2, maybe 3 good bites in it. But Fat Boys are a marvel of modern engineering, towering higher than your average sandwich and not losing their shape as you take at least 6 bites. Square sandwiches are just built better, anyway (let the skinny boys have their underdeveloped rectangular sammies). Some snack food companies will try and trick you into thinking that the road to a heavenly body is paved with ice cream (whether they have lower carbs, or no“added” sugar). But I gotta respect a snack food that calls ’em like it sees ’em. Even if the truth stings a little bit.