Today’s El Pollo Loco IPO is a rare bird. The possibilities for puns are nearly endless – compounded exponentially by all of the rich cliches related to Mexican Food/Fast Food/Birds. I can only imagine that this type of story must be the high point of a financial journalist’s work week. Finally, I can let loose with a few zingers!
Eatocracy gave it a good shot, but their spare mention that “if you’re an investor, you may smell something juicy cooking this week” underwhelmed me. Each paragraph should be chock-full of tender morsels of char-broiled puns, and Eatocracy just lays an egg here.
However, Forbes gets it right with Carol Tice’s post: “Here’s What Investors Who Gobbled El Pollo Loco’s IPO Missed”. She points out that although restaurant IPOs aren’t that attractive in the current economy, “investors chowed down today, driving up the stock price sharply for regional southern California chicken chain El Pollo Loco”. Damn, I wish I could’ve wet my beak on that action.
But wait. Carol’s not done: “What we have here is some tasty chicken, but it’s marinating in an unappetizing mix of longstanding financial and operational challenges.” She’s got a million of them! EXTRA CREDIT: Carol says that with too few franchise owners, “El Pollo Loco could flounder”. Ummm… almost.
The Los Angeles Times’ Shan Li has the home-court advantage with his “El Pollo Loco stock sizzles to close at 60% above IPO Price”, but he is too much of a chicken to come up with anything beyond “sizzle”. We’re told that the IPO had “a sizzling reception on Wall Street”. Using the same pun twice? That’s just fowl. Be more creative! Any bird pun would be fair game.
My kindred spirit at the NY Times’ Dealbook blog teased me with an appetizing opening paragraph – “Investors seem to like the taste of chicken. The puns could be endless for this, investors go crazy for chicken, it’s a chicken run” – but Dealbook just flew the coop and told a straightforward, informative story detailing all of the ins and outs of investing in such a volatile marketplace. BORING! You have a huge audience of pun-loving, greedy, insider-trading Wall Street wolves reading your blog. You’ve got to SELL, SELL, SELL those puns! How about this:
The Gizzards of Oz:
El Pollo Loco Offers Investors a Yellow Brick Road (We’re Not On Alvarado St Anymore)
Chicken and tortillas and Nasdaq, ay yi yi! Wall Street investors are sitting down at the dinner table today, ready to dip into some nuggets of prosperity. Southern California’s El Pollo Loco chain has counted their chickens before they hatched and is serving up their IPO, at an expected base price of $15 a share. And you’ll want to “share” this stock family-style when you see the company’s projected growth over the next quarter. An expansion to 2,300 outlets nationwide? I believe I can fly!
El Pollo Loco gained fame as a fast and healthier alternative to KFC, offering the finest chicken that’s grilled (never fried). In fact, this company should be all up in your portfolio’s grill, with a non-GMO ROI that promises to not be plumped up with fillers (or antibiotics).
Trading on Nasdaq as [LOCO], you’d be crazy to not pluck a few shares from this IPO. Turn your bouillon cubes into… bullion cubes? “